2003/02/19
 
14:51

Malaise

Now that I've hit day 32 of not smoking, I'm finding myself with a certain lack of motivation. Breathing is easier, now, but I find myself less enthusiastic about doing it. On the plus side, my psychic skills have improved. Let's put that to the test.

I want you to imagine yourself on a desert island. No, wait, not quite yet. Wait until I've finished giving you the instructions. Okay, you're only allowed to have two items with you. What would those two items be?

Okay, now stop reading and think about your two choices when you get to the end of this sentence.

If you're peeking ahead, cut it out. Stop and think. Two items. Desert island. Return here when you've made your choices.

Okay, now here's my psychic prediction. I am guessing that you figured this is a silly test and decided to mix me up by picking something "funny", which almost certainly had sexual overtones. Women: "Antonio Banderas and Leonardo DiCaprio". Men: "Pamela Anderson. Two items, get it? Hyuk, hyuk!"

Actually, I'm not sure which two men the ladies would pick. Are AB and LdC still considered hot? I don't watch Entertainment Tonight (is that still on?) so I haven't a clue.

What two items would I pick in that situation? I'm practically minded, so I'd want a GPS receiver and a battery-operated radio transmitter. Pretty dull, eh?

I'm sure Pamela Anderson is a nifty lady (born in Canada, on Canada Day, during the 100th anniversary year of Canada's Confederation), but I think that after being stranded with her for 40 years I'd start wishing I'd gone with The Professor from Gilligan's Island. And MaryAnne, of course.

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